You Will Always Be With Me II, film 2021

John Akomfrah’s iconic 1985 film “Last angel of history’ that references speculative futures and Afro futurism showed me the next steps in developing my theme. Further scholarship by Arman Avanessian and Mahan Moalemi in their paper ‘Ethnofuturisms’ helped solidify the thinking behind my film that is part performance, part ritual and part fantasy.  It is a psychological invocation of the borderland, a place created by emotional residue, of an unnatural boundary. It is in a constant state of transition, the prohibited and forbidden are its inhabitants. I use the body in masquerade, the body that refuses to be recognised, refuses categorisation. I unravel scenes from invented futures at the same time allude to ancestors, forms of divinity and monstrosity. I am also referencing both south Asian iconography and Goddess cults and asserting my femininity as a member of the black diasporic community. The film is a collage of different scenes, cut up and staccato, (much like the mirrored cut-outs) with a prophetic and poetic narrative going through its length. was composed in collaboration with the theme and mood in mind. The soundscape of the film follows the structure of the images, it is an assemblage of found music and original score with the narrative element. The texture of the music has a haptic quality to it and aims to add to the internal monologue.

W E B Du Bois talks about a double consciousness experienced by colonised people, it means ‘always looking at oneself through the eyes of the coloniser and measuring oneself by the standards of the colonising nation that looked back in contempt’. This double consciousness can also be applied to women living in patriarchal societies. By playing the protagonist in my film, as a shaman wearing her otherness and alienness for all to see is rewriting her own narrative for the future, I revel in my multiplicity, in my search for that elusive place called ‘home’.